ANOTHER KIND OF GRAVITY

Romans 7:21-23 
"I have discovered this principle of life..that when I want to do what is right, I ineveitably do what is wrong.  I love God's law with all my heart.  But there is another power in me that is at war with my mind.  This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me."   The Message

I can't prove the science behind it but I'm convinced that there is another kind of gravity.  It's not a physical force that can be measured but it's a force that is easily felt on a daily basis.  It's a resistance to doing the right thing and a lot of times it feels like the heavy pull of gravity.

Sometimes it comes in the form of a Saturday college football game and right as I sit down, my eight year old son asks me to come outside and throw the football with him.  That's when I feel it, it pulls against me making the right decision.  It tells me that there will be other days to throw the football which is a bit of a lie.  The truth is, there will always college football games but there will not always be an eight year old boy who wants to throw the football with his dad.

Sometimes the gravity comes in the form of exercise.  I finally get some time to go for a run and as I'm about head down the street, I notice that my 72 year old neighbor is sitting in his screened in garage alone.  He's alone a lot these days because his sweet wife passed away two years ago.  His daughter and granddaughter are really good about visiting with him regularly but even then, he's still alone alot.  I realize that I should probably stop over for a while and just spend time with him.  Once again, I feel the tug.  I hear gravity tell me that I can visit with him on another day...again, it's such an obvious lie.  My neighbor is 72 and the reality is that he biologically just doesn't have that many days left.

The more I am aware of it, the more I see a pattern emerging.  This strange force seems to show up every time there is a right decision to be made.  It's funny how those right and crucial choices never seem to come up at convenient times.  My neighbor never seems to be in his garage when I'm bored and looking for something to do.  It's the same with my son.  Anytime I think about throwing a football around, he's playing with a friend or doing something else.

I've also noticed another pattern.  Some of the most meaningful moments I've had with my neighbor and with my son were moments that came only after fighting through that gravity, getting up and going out.

We live in an upside down world so I guess I shouldn't be that surprised that this other kind of gravity will always try to pull me in the wrong direction but if I let it, that same gravity can act as a reverse compass pointing me in the right direction..

HE NEVER GETS OVER US

Psalm 139:2 "..He knows when I lie down to sleep and when I rise to wake"

I can't think of the last time I watched my kids while they slept.  My oldest is now 13, my middle is 11, and my youngest is 7.  They're growing up so fast.
I remember watching all three of them at different times when they were babies.  I was so smitten with them..I would just sit in amazement at how perfect and peaceful they were as they slept.  I was always wonderstruck when I would see them smile in their sleep and watch their eye movement beneath their little eyelids indicating that they were dreaming.  What could they possibly be dreaming about after only a few weeks or months on this earth?  Is it possible that they could remember the face of their Maker as He was smiling and cooing over them as He made them?  I'm pretty sure they were not smiling over the memories of their first experience of arriving on this earth.

I'm not sure why but I don't ever take the time to watch them any more.  I'm certainly not 'over it' or, by any stretch, less in love with them than I've ever been.  I guess it's just the nature of imperfect human love.  The 'shine' wears off and we stop taking note of the little miraculous details that happen daily in their growth and development.

I love the passage in Psalm 139 because it reminds me that God still watches us when we sleep.  How else would He know when we lie down and when we awake?  God is still absolutely smitten with us.  He never gets over us....ever.

DISCIPLEOSOURUS

1 Corinthians 11:1 "Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ."

When thinking about discipleship, my mind naturally goes to the topic of dinosaurs...doesn't everyone's? I have always been fascinated by the topic of dinosaurs.  I remember being amazed in elementary school science class at the textbooks of what these colossal reptiles looked like.  I loved hearing about the different types of meat eaters and vegetarians and the way that some dinosaurs were predatory hunters and others were passive grazers.  My teacher would teach with such certainty about how the triceratops would defend itself with it's powerful three horned charge or how the Stegosaurus would use it's massive mace like tail as a strong defense against the sharp teeth of the Tyrranosaurus Rex or a charging pack of Velociraptors. 

But as I've grown older I've realized there's a huge problem with all of the science around dinosaurs..no one has ever actually seen a living dinosaur!  Almost all of it is educated speculation.  By the bone fossils left behind we can deduce that there were dinosaurs.  We can even get an idea of their skeletal structure but we would know so much more if we could just see them and their behavior in real life. 

We as disciples of Jesus are a lot like dinosaurs.  We are the only living example of what it looks like to follow Christ in the world today.  The unbeliever does not go the instruction manual of scripture or the example of Jesus to see what it's supposed to look like.  They are listening to what we say but significantly more so, they're watching what we do.  They don't know what we should be doing or what it's supposed to look like..they are looking to us to show them what we are.

This is also true of new believers who come behind us.  Though they do go to the authority of scripture and the perfect example of Jesus, they're still looking at us to see how the Gospel is lived out in our modern context and all of the unique dilemnas, temptations and opportunites in the cultures we live in. 

In a way, we are the like the dinosaurs in the movie Jurassic Park.  But instead of mosquito DNA, we've been reanimated by the Spirit of God and if we let Him, the blood, flesh and skin of our Lord is spiritually being added back to our bones so that the world and all who come behind us can have a clear picture of how Jesus and those who follow Him lived and loved.

Father, we help us to look like Jesus, to act like Jesus, and to love like Jesus so the world will see You and how much You love them through us.

HELPFUL

John 6:9-11 "there's a young boy here with five barley loaves and two fish.  But what good is that with this huge crowd?"

"Tell everyone to sit down,"Jesus said.  So they all sat down on the grassy slopes.  (The men alone numbered about 5,000.)  Then Jesus took the loaves, gave thanks to God, and distributed them to the people.  Afterward, He did the same with the fish.  And they all ate as much as they wanted.

One day, I think we'll be very surprised to hear from Jesus why He did certain miracles and who He did them for.  It's very clear in the story of the loaves and the fishes that the miracle was a blessing for the five thousand plus hungry people who had come to hear Jesus but I think the miracle was also for one little boy..the one who brought the loaves and fishes.. 

When I read this story, I can't help but think of my little Zac.  My son Zach is seven years old and he loves to be helpful.  I can totally picture Zac being the boy who hears about the crisis and comes to the disciples offering his little basket of bread and fish...and when the disciples said "but what good is that with this huge crowd?", I can also see his dejected little face look down at the ground and his lip start to quiver because he so wanted to be helpful and the disciples pretty much called his helpful offer useless.  I know that face because I've seen it.  I've done the same thing to him more times than I care to admit.

But, thankfully, Jesus isn't like us.  Jesus saw the sweetness and the enormous amount of faith in the little boy's offer and decided to make a huge deal out of it.  When the passage says that Jesus gave thanks to God I think His prayer might of sounded something like this..

"Father! Thank you so much for Zac's perfect gift!.  This is EXACTLY what we needed and we are soooo grateful that you brought Zac to us today.  If it not for him, we wouldn't be able to eat today. But because you brought him and his awesome gift of bread and fish, we will not go hungry today!  Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!!"

And as He said "Amen!", I can totally picture Zac's whole face lighting up and a smile breaking across his face...I can see the wonder in his eyes when, as the basket's were being passed, they continued to yield bread and fish until every mouth was fed.  And then to top it off, Jesus says "gather the leftovers so that NOTHING is wasted."  Even in this, Jesus is giving great value to the little boys gift. I would imagine that he sent the boy home to his family with far more than five loaves and two fish, giving him the chance to be the hero once again that night.

I know that I'm definitely using alot of sanctified imagination here but I do think it's not far off because that's the way Jesus is.  He makes a huge deal of the little gestures of faith.  He goes way out of His way to make all of us and just one of us feel helpful.

PRIESTS

1 Peter 2:9 "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood...."

What if God expects us to take this verse literally?  What if we really are supposed to be priests wherever we are?  What would it look like?  Does it mean that we're all supposed to go into vocational church work?  What if  someone knows that God has made them to be a banker, or a lawyer, or a police officer, or a stay at home mom?

I think a simple answer can be found by looking at the things that priests do. Before scandal and abuse rocked the Catholic church and screwed up the image that comes to mind when we think of the word 'priest', there was a much better and more biblical picture of what being a priest looked like. 

A good Catholic priest was someone that really knew how to listen. Listening is a lost art in our day and, more than ever, people are so desperate for someone to just listen to them.  What if being a priest is simply becoming the guy or gal in the office that does a lot more listening than talking? 

A priest was someone that you knew that you could confess your deepest darkest sins to and it would be kept in strictest confidence.  What if being a priest wherever you are is just simply being the person that people feel safe sharing their secrets with?  What if, by not being a gossip, your neighbors or the people you work with began to see you as someone that they can talk with about things that they are really ashamed of, knowing that you will love them without judgement.

A priest was known for being gracious and unexplainably forgiving.  I love the picture painted in Les Miserables of the priest, who after the police clearly prove that Jean Valjean has stolen the priest's silver candle stick holders (after having taken Jean Valjean into his home), tells the police that they were a gift but that he forgot the rest of the gift.  He then gives Jean Valjean the rest of the very expensive silver dining set.  We would show God well to the world if we were know for such crazy acts of grace and compassion. 

A priest was known for always being there.  It's very hard to find people who are faithfully there for you these days.  Whether it be a funeral, the birth of a child, or a loved one's illness, priests were known for always being there.  Though at times, they were there to officiate such events as a representative of the church, more often than not, they were just there to be there.  What if we were the guy or gal who showed up to sit with a co-worker  while there spouse was in surgery?  What if we were known for showing up at funeral not because we knew the deceased but because a co-worker or neighbor had lost a loved on and you were just there to support them.

A priest was known for knowing God.  A good priest was not only known for knowing about God and knowing the Bible.  A good priest was known for knowing God.  There is a Catholic radio station where I live and, though I am a Protestant evangelical (whatever that means), I will occasionally tune in to listen.  There is an older priest that will be on the air from time to time and when I listen to the smile in His voice and the joyfully familiar way that He talks with and about God, I KNOW that He knows Jesus well and spends time in His presence daily.  His love and joy allow him to effectively communicate even the harder and confrontational truths of God's word.  Again, we would represent God well if, even in our hard and confrontational conversations, love and joy radiated through our words and actions.

Father, help us to become the wise, trustworthy, loving priesthood that you have called us to be everywhere that you have called us to go.

THE KINGDOM IS LIKE A BOB DYLAN SONG

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify Your Father which is in heaven." KJV Bible

A few years back, I was in Nashville to celebrate my parents' 40th anniversary. While I was there, I had the opportunity to attend a live show with my brother where ten local artist/musicians from the Nashville area (Ten of Tenn) collaborated to create an incredible music experience. It was a beautiful experience because the whole nature of the performance was very much about the songs and not about the individual artists. The ten artists took turns sharing their songs and when they weren't singing their own songs, they would rotate to an instrument and play in the band for another artist. Everybody seemed to be there to share and enjoy each others music for the sake of enjoying music.

After the last song was sung the whole band came to the front of the stage and chose to end the experience in a very unique way. They all came down into the middle of the audience (it was a bar/music hall so everyone was standing) with their instruments unplugged and began to sing the Bob Dylan tune "I Shall Be Released". As they began to sing, everyone in the room began to sing with them as only a Nashville audience can. The environment in the room became everything that Nashville should be as everyone was simply sharing in the song. I think I may have been one of the only people in the room that didn't know the song and never in my life have I so badly wanted to know the words.

As I have thought about that night, I wonder if maybe that's what our invitation to those outside of God's Kingdom should look like. Maybe our lives are supposed to be like a melody that is so sweet that everyone around us wants to know the words so they can sing along..

CIGARETTE SMOKE

"Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God, which is recognized by those on the way to salvation - an aroma redolent with life"  2 Corinthians 2: 16, The Message

I love the smell of cigarette smoke, particularly Salem cigarettes. I think it's because a family member smoked that brand when I was a child and the smell reminds me of being a kid.

It's funny how the societal perception of smokers has so drastically changed over the last couple of decades. Now when I walk past the designated smoking area in the airport, I immediately rush to hyper-judgement of the 'dirty' smokers with their 'dirty' cigarettes huddled together in their glass chamber of addiction. In our modern caste system of addictions, cigarette smokers are at the bottom of the pile...the lepers.

I have a pretty good idea of how God feels about cigarettes overall but I suspect that there is one particular type of cigarette smoke that God may actually like. It's the cigarette smoke that you smell outside of any addiction recover meeting.

On Tuesday nights, when I used to lead worship for our college worship service in Buffalo, and as I would leave each week, I would see the recovery crowd hanging out in the parking lot of our church because they had just wrapped up their meeting. Not everyone was smoking but at least a few normally were and I loved the smell of their smoke because of what it represents. It's a step forward...it represents getting up one more time after getting knocked down... it represents the transition of going from a greater and more destructive addiction such as cocaine or alcohol to a lesser and more non-consequential addiction such as cigarettes.

I know that God's ultimate design is that we not be addicted to anything but, in a fallen world, sometimes, we just have to take it one step at a time.  And whether it's being addicted to alcohol or approval, sex or success, pills or pride, we're all in a fight to get free.  I'm sure in their journey to freedom, there will be a place where they realize that they need to be free of their need for cigarettes but for now, the odor of their smoke will be the aroma of little and daily battles fought that lead to sweet and great victories.

YOU PASSED!!

Luke 15:5-7 And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home.  Then He calls his friends and neighbors together and says, "Rejoice with me! I have found my lost sheep." I tell you in the same way, there will be more rejoicing in Heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who do not need to repent. (NIV)

Sometime ago, there was a viral video going around of a father's reaction to his kid telling him he had passed a test at school.  When the father found out that his kid had passed, the father began to shout  in celebration and jump and down in elation.  He was so moved that he began to weep for joy at his son's success.  I'm not sure what struggle had led up to the kid's passing but the dad's elation was such a rich and beautiful moment between a father and son.

I'm not sure if it's because the man was Jewish or if it was because there was a "holy manliness" even in his weeping, but something about the whole moment reminded me of God.
I think that is how God celebrates every time we pass that test the we have repeatedly failed or every time we overcome the addiction...And when we step out and take that huge step faith I think he reacts just like that father did.  He jumps up and down and proclaims "my son, my daughter..you passed!! you passed!! You did it!! I'm so proud of You!!!"

I wonder what would happen if I started looking at trials and tests as a chance to make my Father crazy happy.  Instead of seeing temptation as a negative shameful consequence to be avoided, what if I also saw it as an opportunity to make my Father go crazy celebrating in a spike-a-footbal-touchdown-dance kind of way.  What if I started picturing my Dad in Heaven calling all of the angels over and making them watch His DVR'd recording of my victory over and over again like it was in the ESPN top ten plays of the day segment.

I think God is that way and knowing that makes me want to get it right.  Not because I'm trying to get Him to love me but because I know He loves me and He, more than anyone else, loves to wildly celebrates my victories.

WITH

Psalm 103:8 The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.


Why does God take so long sometimes?  If I am honest, I have definitely asked that question a lot.  Sometimes the whole theology of God's omnipotence (unlimited power) and his sovereignty (complete control of all things) are more of a stumbling block for me than they are a help because I know that there are so many things that He could do for me that would make my life so much easier.  I don't feel bad about wrestling with all of this though because I know I'm surrounded by a "great cloud of witnesses" both in my present church family and in my Biblical family tree of sinners and saints who have also wrestled with God's timing and way of doing things.

In his message on Sunday, Pastor Charlie Weir said something that seemed to bring an answer in part to some of my questions.  He said, "process is God doing something with us when we want God to do something for us."

That quote makes me think of the "dad" side of God.  What if God's way of doing things is more like a dad, who happens to be a master builder, choosing to build a tree house with his son?  If it was about building a tree house then the dad would build a tree house built to spec with every board cut to the perfect length with perfectly level floor and walls.  Because He was a builder by trade, it would take him no longer than a weekend to build the perfect treehouse FOR his son.

But it's not about building a treehouse..and so a good dad lets his son be a part of building the treehouse.  The master builder dad bites his lip when his son cuts every board to a different length. He just smiles as his boy lays a floor that has more angles than a carnival fun house.  And a lot of times when the boy gets impatient over the hours (that turn into weekends) that it's taking to get the treehouse done, a good dad doesn't tell his son that the delay is coming from the son with all of his mismeasurements that lead to miscuts that lead to trips to the hardware store for more wood and more nails.

But finally, when the treehouse is done (and safe to enter because the dad has come back out when the son was either asleep or at school to make subtle corrections that make the treehouse safe), the father and son stand side by side in awe of what they built together and say "look what we did!".  A treehouse is about what "we" did.

And I am starting to understand why God "takes so long".  It's taking so long cause He's let me be involved in the process...
He's a dad who wants to build something with me because He just wants to be with me.

AUTHORIZED OR DIRECTED

Luke 10:19 Look, I have given you all authority over the powers of the enemy, and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them.

In preparation for our trip for Africa, my wife and I had a will drawn up just in case something happened to us as we were both traveling overseas.  It's nothing that anybody likes to think about but  is obviously, a wise and necessary step.

In the process of getting my living will completed, I had an option as to what would happen if I was in a comatose state and unable to make a decision as to how long I would want to be kept on life support if the doctor said there was little to no hope of my recovering.  My option was to either direct my wife in what she would do or I could authorize her to make the decision for me.  The difference in the two decisions was if I direct her, then she would have no say in the decision, she would legally be bound to carry out whatever I had directed.  If I authorize her, then I am trusting her look at the circumstances and make the decision on what she hears from the doctor balanced by what she feels in her gut.

I chose to authorize her to make the decision.  I chose this because, though I am leaving her to make a very painful decision, I know she will know what to do.  Some understandably don't want their spouse to make that decision because it is an unbearably hard one for anyone to make but with us still having young children, I need my wife to make that choice based on what the doctors say and more importantly, what her very reliable gut feeling tells her.  I know my wife loves me and her love will guide her to the right decision.

I think, at times, God's will is a lot this process.  In the New Testament there are various places where Jesus tells us that He has given us authority but often, in those areas where we have already been given authority, we live as those who need to be directed.  What if God's will is sometimes as simple as, "what need do you see? Go meet that need"...or "does the homeless guy in the street need new shoes or a new coat?...do you have two coats or two pair of shoes?...give him one of yours."  For us the question was "did Jenna meet a girl in Africa who is an orphan?...do you have the money and the love capacity to take her in and let her call you mommy and daddy?..then you know My will."

And even in all of those questions, we've already been clearly directed in scripture.  But we are also authorized to answer the 'how?' and the 'when?'.  What if God desires for us to get to a place where He knows that we love Him deeply enough that He can trust us to make decisions on His behalf without us having to wait until He gives us specific direction (when He often already has..).  I also know that from personal experience that as soon as we take the authority to step out and do something, He will give us clear and specific direction as we get going, but often never until we get going.

Father, help us to step out in the authority you've already given and let our love for You and our love for one another guide us in doing whatever needs to be done today as those you have authorized to be Your help in a helpless world.

STOP

Exodus 33:18 Then Moses said, "Now show me Your glory."

I'm starting to wonder if the greatest act of Christian rebellion against this crazy busy world is to become a people who are known for stopping their lives...stopping our lives for each other and stopping our lives at the slightest prompt that God may want to show us something beautiful that He has made.

A couple of weeks ago, as I was driving home, I couldn't help but notice the sunset.  It's not uncommon for me to notice the sunset because I am a hack Instagrammer so I'm always looking for a cool picture.  This time it was different though.  The sunset was strikingly vivid.  The clouds were taking on a purple and orangish hue and the sun was a rich mix of yellow and gold.  But even more than the beauty of it was this weird sense I got that God was either frustrated or angry.  I don't know if it was God or not, but as I asked God what it was that I was sensing, I felt like I heard God ask, "are you going to miss it too?".."are you going to be counted with the millions and millions who miss this every day?"  So I pulled my car over on the side of the road and took a picture just to, in my own way, not miss it.

Later that night, during the worship at a bible study I was attending, the worship leader asked us to pray "show us Your glory!".  As I was praying, I think I heard God say with a tinge of sadness, "I already have..".  

And then it began to settle in as to what God might have been trying to tell me.  How many times do we pray that prayer "show us Your glory!" and then immediately let ourselves be led away by distraction of social media or whatever urgent task our daily calendar demands of us for the day.  

If I was Moses, I'm afraid that when that moment came where God passed by to answer my prayer of "show me Your glory", I would have missed it because I was looking at my twitter account or fighting with my phone because I couldn't get coverage there in the cleft of the rock.  

I hope that I can grow to be more like Moses when He says, "If your presence does not got with us, do not send us up from here.." (Exodus 33:15) and wait until God shows up.  It doesn't necessarily mean that I sit at home all day, but it does mean that I would go about my day expecting and looking for God's answer to my prayer.  And whether He answers through a stunning sunset or some other creatively glorious way, that I would drop everything, stop what I'm doing, and take every bit of it in. 

99 AND 1

Luke 15:3-5 "So He told them this parable, saying, 'What man among you, if he has a hundred sheep and has lost one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the open pasture and go after the one which is lost until He finds it?  When he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders rejoicing.'" NASB

We had hoped that our adoption court date would be Monday or Tuesday because our flight was scheduled to leave Tuesday night.  On Monday, we found out that our court date would be Wednesday morning simply because...it's Africa.  So to be safe, we scheduled our flight to get us back home to our other three children by Friday...two days longer than we had planned...two days longer than what already felt like an unbearable amount of time for both of us to be away from our children.  But by staying, we knew that we'd have a good chance of getting the court approval part of our adoption process over with and be one step closer to adopting a little girl and removing the title of orphan over her life.

Feeling the pain of having to be away from my other three children for just two more days makes me realize that I had it all wrong in the way I understood the passage where Jesus says that the good shepherd leaves the ninety-nine sheep to go find the one lost sheep.  I had always interpreted the passage in a way that made it seem like the Good Shepherd loved the 1 more than he loved the other 99 and he was so burdened about the one that was missing that he had no remorse about leaving the other ninety-nine.  But now I realize that, while He was out looking for the one, he was deeply missing being with each and all of the other sheep that he had left safe at home.  He loves all of them the same and feels the emptiness and the heavy ache of being away from any of His.  He is like any parent who wants all of their children safe in one place at one time.  Anything other than that will cause Him to go to the ends of the earth until all are safely home.

Thank You Father, that whether I am the one or the ninety-nine, you have gone and will go to whatever measures necessary to find me and bring me home because You are a good Father who is aware of each and everyone of His children